This is something that has been hard for me, born student, to understand. But he's helped me along, as I never doubt his intelligence, despite his repeated struggles in school. I get frustrated with how things turn out for him sometimes, because turning in a paper late, or failing a course was my worst ever nightmare in school. [This is also because I have a small problem with authority, which I can only attribute to my Catholic upbringing and my status as the oldest child.] I tried for a little while to "help" him, but I realized in the process that I was trying to change him so he could be more like I was. I'm over it now.
I mean. The poor guy. His whole life trying to exist in a system that just didn't fit his needs as a bright guy with trouble learning the way other kids do. His parents, forgive me, weren't that much help to boot--his dad's a big-time science professor and his mom is a lawyer. They are Polish, and their culture led them to be less inclined to pathologize (which in certain cases isn't a bad thing, but I think it might have helped him a bit had he known he had a disability of some sort, rather than an inherent flaw in his makeup). In other words, they didn't really believe in learning disabilities such as ADHD and so never had him evaluated. Instead, they promised to buy him a puppy if his grades improved, and, well, he never got that puppy.
I just wish he could get out of school already, and start doing the great things that I already know he can do, not to prove anything to anyone else, but so that he can realize how great he is.
This one's for you my dear, and this will be you when you have finished school ("l'ecole est fini!") - xo:
notes - Mel Chin talk at MCAD
4 weeks ago